...And thus Jeff Shaw and I are proven prescient
People laugh at me when I say that onions are poison. I'm not one to say "I told you so", but take a look at this, and weep, and then take the whole roll of toilet paper with you as you live with the results of eating your precious onions...
Seriously people, they tip you off to their malfeasance with their disgusting taste, noxious odor, and disturbing texture! Why would you eat something that makes you cry every time you use it? They are like a bad boyfriend. Why do you keep them around? Kick them to the curb!
Not that I know what having a bad boyfriend is like. I've seen it on TV.
Oh yeah, I told you so!
Seriously people, they tip you off to their malfeasance with their disgusting taste, noxious odor, and disturbing texture! Why would you eat something that makes you cry every time you use it? They are like a bad boyfriend. Why do you keep them around? Kick them to the curb!
Not that I know what having a bad boyfriend is like. I've seen it on TV.
Oh yeah, I told you so!
posted by mmm... @ 11:19 AM
4 Comments:
At 12/07/2006 3:38 PM ,
Renee said...
green onions /= regular onions. scallions don't make you cry, and they have the same texture as a lot of greens... and besides, a lot of other foods are just as deadly in terms of carrying disease (e.g., almost every meat, spinach, anything "organically grown")
although I will keep your general advice in mind :)
At 12/08/2006 2:51 PM ,
mmm... said...
Semantics I say. Semantics! An onion by any other name is still rank and reeks.
Yes, if a boy regularly makes you cry when you use him, he deserves to be booted. But you shouldn't be using boys anyway; it's not nice. And you certainly shouldn't be cutting them up to cook them. Please follow that advice too! I don't wanna be stir fried!
At 12/10/2006 3:39 PM ,
David Tresner-Kirsch said...
I was going to refute your points, but Renee has beaten me to it quite effectively. Go team Massachusetts!
At 12/11/2006 1:33 PM ,
KendiT said...
Yes, Go Renee! Green onions rarely make people cry. Plus, if you chew gum while chopping white or red onions they don't make you cry.
And for the record, since when did Taco Bell become the premier authority on food. That's just wrong.
I mean by that stand you shouldn't eat hamburgers because of the Jack-In -the-Box cases, after all, some people cry every time they think about hamburger.
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