DC Sleeps

 

...And thus Jeff Shaw and I are proven prescient

People laugh at me when I say that onions are poison. I'm not one to say "I told you so", but take a look at this, and weep, and then take the whole roll of toilet paper with you as you live with the results of eating your precious onions...
Seriously people, they tip you off to their malfeasance with their disgusting taste, noxious odor, and disturbing texture! Why would you eat something that makes you cry every time you use it? They are like a bad boyfriend. Why do you keep them around? Kick them to the curb!




Not that I know what having a bad boyfriend is like. I've seen it on TV.





Oh yeah, I told you so!

Run of the mill

I did 8 loads of laundry in 2 days. That should cover me for a bit. Remember, I have a pretty small washer, but 8 does seem like a bit much. The fungus on my pants tipped me off that maybe it was time.

I went to the barber today. It's been more than two months, and I was starting to look like a hippie, like David. But my last haircut was awful, and I just needed to find a new, real barber that wasn't a Vietnamese lady trained on the job (I think was like the 3rd customer for one lady. She really needed to work on "The Barber's Touch" as well as "The Cutting of Hair Evenly"). In my life, I've had 5 good barbers: Joe, Tony, Ron, Tony, and Joe. I looked in the phone book, but I didn't find a single Joe or Tony. The next best thing was Pete. Pete did a great job. He's fast, efficient, did what I asked for, and had "The Touch" down (not to be confused with "The Touchdown"). He left hair in my eyes for a little too long, and I could have used a spray down, but otherwise he was just what I was looking for. He cleared out my 2-month-old hack job with skill and efficiency, talked just enough, and cost only $12. Thanks Pete! Random side note: Pete's last name is Xerxes, which was my first screen name on AOL 12 years ago.

Chocolate Pop Rocks say on the back, "Store in a cool, dry place". Unfortunately, this doesn't mean if you put them in a hot dry place (say, in the flame of a lighter) that they combust in any notable fashion. They just melt. Ah well. Guess I need more ping pong balls. Thanks to Amanda for providing the Christmas presents necessary to try this.

A long day's journey into night

Circus peanuts are disgusting.